Yes, it's as good as you've heard.
Yes, it's kinda dangerous having four gallons of boiling oil over an open flame.
And yes, if you follow Alton Brown's instructions it will all work out just dandy. Best bird ever.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Airport Security
The Israelis are close to deploying an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners at most airports.
It's a booth you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you. They see this as a win-win for everyone with none of this crap about racial profiling. It also would eliminate the costs of a long and expensive trial. Justice would be swift. Case closed!
Picture this. You would be in the airport terminal and hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter an announcement comes over the PA system . . . "Attention EL AL standby passengers - we now have a seat available on flight number XXXX. Shalom! And have a pleasant flight."
Followed by: "Clean-up at security point A."
It's a booth you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you. They see this as a win-win for everyone with none of this crap about racial profiling. It also would eliminate the costs of a long and expensive trial. Justice would be swift. Case closed!
Picture this. You would be in the airport terminal and hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter an announcement comes over the PA system . . . "Attention EL AL standby passengers - we now have a seat available on flight number XXXX. Shalom! And have a pleasant flight."
Followed by: "Clean-up at security point A."
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Getting Hitched
Ever since the moment my finace and I became engaged all I can manage to think about is the whole getting married thing. Everything about it, every detail swarms through my head day and night. I want to go back to the moment my fiance purposed and do it over and over again. All the while I want to get to the wedding, while still wanting to enjoy the engagement.
My every thought will be completely consumed with all these thoughts for all of the foreseeable future - Thank Heaven Almighty. (I hope I'm not dreaming this all up as it certainly does feel like a dream).
My every thought will be completely consumed with all these thoughts for all of the foreseeable future - Thank Heaven Almighty. (I hope I'm not dreaming this all up as it certainly does feel like a dream).
Monday, November 8, 2010
We Could Learn a Lot From a Dead English Poet
The God's of The Copybook Headings by Rudyard Kipling
As I pass through my incarnations in every age and race,
I make my proper prostrations to the Gods of the Market Place.
Peering through reverent fingers I watch them flourish and fall,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings, I notice, outlast them all.
We were living in trees when they met us. They showed us each in turn
That Water would certainly wet us, as Fire would certainly burn:
But we found them lacking in Uplift, Vision and Breadth of Mind,
So we left them to teach the Gorillas while we followed the March of Mankind.
We moved as the Spirit listed. They never altered their pace,
Being neither cloud nor wind-borne like the Gods of the Market Place;
But they always caught up with our progress, and presently word would come
That a tribe had been wiped off its icefield, or the lights had gone out in Rome.
With the Hopes that our World is built on they were utterly out of touch,
They denied that the Moon was Stilton; they denied she was even Dutch;
They denied that Wishes were Horses; they denied that a Pig had Wings;
So we worshipped the Gods of the Market Who promised these beautiful things.
When the Cambrian measures were forming, They promised perpetual peace.
They swore, if we gave them our weapons, that the wars of the tribes would cease.
But when we disarmed They sold us and delivered us bound to our foe,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " Stick to the Devil you know."
On the first Feminian Sandstones we were promised the Fuller Life
(Which started by loving our neighbour and ended by loving his wife)
Till our women had no more children and the men lost reason and faith,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " The Wages of Sin is Death."
In the Carboniferous Epoch we were promised abundance for all,
By robbing selected Peter to pay for collective Paul;
But, though we had plenty of money, there was nothing our money could buy,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " If you don't work you die."
Then the Gods of the Market tumbled, and their smooth-tongued wizards withdrew
And the hearts of the meanest were humbled and began to believe it was true
That All is not Gold that Glitters, and Two and Two make Four —
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings limped up to explain it once more.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man —
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: —
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;
And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!
As I pass through my incarnations in every age and race,
I make my proper prostrations to the Gods of the Market Place.
Peering through reverent fingers I watch them flourish and fall,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings, I notice, outlast them all.
We were living in trees when they met us. They showed us each in turn
That Water would certainly wet us, as Fire would certainly burn:
But we found them lacking in Uplift, Vision and Breadth of Mind,
So we left them to teach the Gorillas while we followed the March of Mankind.
We moved as the Spirit listed. They never altered their pace,
Being neither cloud nor wind-borne like the Gods of the Market Place;
But they always caught up with our progress, and presently word would come
That a tribe had been wiped off its icefield, or the lights had gone out in Rome.
With the Hopes that our World is built on they were utterly out of touch,
They denied that the Moon was Stilton; they denied she was even Dutch;
They denied that Wishes were Horses; they denied that a Pig had Wings;
So we worshipped the Gods of the Market Who promised these beautiful things.
When the Cambrian measures were forming, They promised perpetual peace.
They swore, if we gave them our weapons, that the wars of the tribes would cease.
But when we disarmed They sold us and delivered us bound to our foe,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " Stick to the Devil you know."
On the first Feminian Sandstones we were promised the Fuller Life
(Which started by loving our neighbour and ended by loving his wife)
Till our women had no more children and the men lost reason and faith,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " The Wages of Sin is Death."
In the Carboniferous Epoch we were promised abundance for all,
By robbing selected Peter to pay for collective Paul;
But, though we had plenty of money, there was nothing our money could buy,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: " If you don't work you die."
Then the Gods of the Market tumbled, and their smooth-tongued wizards withdrew
And the hearts of the meanest were humbled and began to believe it was true
That All is not Gold that Glitters, and Two and Two make Four —
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings limped up to explain it once more.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man —
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: —
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;
And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Star Trek: A New Vision
Reluctant as I was to see the new Star Trek movie, I gave in and rented it. I wish that I had had faith enough to see it in the theatre as I thought it was amazing. There was little that I disliked about it and my Trekkie geekdom ruled throughout. This is a movie I will one day own. I wanted to stand up at the end and clap (as I said, geekdom ruled).
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Morning After Pill
Today I am (once again) frustrated and a disappointed, though not as much as I could be mind you. I am embarrassed to live in a "blue state" and can't believe the number of libtards that surround me. I get jazzed when I go to the voting booth and feel privileged and honored to be able to do so, but the end result is not nearly as thrilling.
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